What the fuck happened to Ecto Cooler!?
You know that green colored, orange flavored drink of amazingness? Yea, what happened? Well apparently the whores over at Hi-C decided to take Slimer off of the package an replace it with a pair of green juice lips. SOURCE.
I remember going to the supermarket with my mom and covertly slipping the cooler into the shopping cart only for her to discover it at the checkout line. Too late to put it back, so she has to buy it. Big mistake on her part. I would go home and dress up in my Ghostbuster get-up and drink the whole friggen 12 pack in one sitting. After that much cooler gets ingested by a 10 year old, shit is about the go off. Ghosts would then be real, and I’d be chasing them all over the house.
Imagine being the parent sitting there watching your kid go absolutely ape shit over trying to catch your dog thinking it was a ghost. Believe me kid, that dog ain’t gonna fit into the trap. Its been attempted before.
You always wondered as a youngan, how was the drink green and it tasted orange? Well simple answer really. Food dye, dumbass. But you can’t really blame the youth for wondering. Hell, it could have been Slimer jizz for all we cared about, and we still would have drank that shit.
What does today’s youth have to drink? Granted Hawaiian Punch and Kool-Aid are still in business, but they do not have anything nearly as cool or as exciting as Ecto-Cooler. I say all of us who remember and loved this drink of greatness, get on our horses, and write to Mr. Hi-C and demand they bring back Slimer.
You will also notice that Ecto-Cooler is never mentioned as a juice. It was DRINK. I could quote Mr. Chappelle here, but some of you might be offended, so I’ll leave it up to you to “Insert Quote Here”.