Viking Porn/Sex

As Pirates, we consider the Vikings to be our forefathers because they were insane as fuck. Speaking of which, I came across this today in my quest for more Viking knowledge:

The shirt is solid and is pretty much all this web site has to offer.

If you’re looking for some info on Viking porn, the Uncyclopediahas got some crazy insight in what went on some 1,000 years ago. Want proof? Check out this passage on Viking sex:

The favored weapons of most Vikings are the over-sized battle penis, the dildo, the bastard raper, and the rat bastard raper.

and…

-Viking Launcher: This shoots a Viking towards the enemies. Because Vikings are indestructible, and real men, the Viking will make a huge dent(The Viking being unharmed, of course), or cause lasers to shoot out of everyone’s eyes. This uncertainty is explained by the equation Laser Eyes May = Vikings + Launcher + Raping and Pillaging.

and of course…

If you ever encounter a Viking, dont run. This will only anger the Viking. If encoutered, immediately create a protection circle of dirty sporks, insert a pink cork into the anus and/or vagina to prevent rape and because vikings cannot touch pink, and call out for the assistance of a nearby Mormon.

There’s actually bastards out there as sick as us. Wow.

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