The divorce of Texas and Thomas Jefferson

Texas. It’s a huge ass state that the U.S. fought for against the Mexicans in the Mexican War and was annexed quickly afterward as a result. It is a state where things are big – boobs, sports teams budgets, food, and people. It is a state where Bush came from. Enough said.

Thomas Jefferson. He wrote our Declaration of Independence and had a lot of influence on the Constitution and Bill of Rights. He was the 3rd U.S. President. He made the Louisiana Purchase (which put us closer to Texas) from France. He also impregnated his slave Sally Hemmings. He also rocked a nice blow out and was named man of the millennium (not falcon).

Divorce. A separation of two people or things usually over some crazy circumstance (money, cheating, etc.). Think Sally Field and Burt Reynolds. Think Jon and Kate. Think Raquel Welch. Think Seattle and the Supersonics. Think Texas and Thomas Jefferson?

According to the brilliant folks on the Texas School Board, Thomas Jefferson was too much of a leftist and will be left out of the state’s curriculum for History. Basically no kids for the next ten years will learn anything about Thomas Jefferson because the state believes he’s too much of a bad influence on its children. The guy only bought the land that enticed people to move west. He only created the document that gave us our freedom. Definitely no big deal, right?

I don’t know about you, but I’m at a loss here. What’s up with Texas?

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2 Responses to The divorce of Texas and Thomas Jefferson

  1. If they weren’t trying to so hard to deify the founding fathers, people might actually realize they’re actually flawed, complex human beings. He’s a bit of a hypocrite on the slavery issue, but over TJ did way more good than bad I’d say


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