AKA, don’t be a douche and go posting on Facebook when you are shit faced computer program. That’s right people, now you can stop your Dad heading to Facebook after a few High Life’s and posting how your farts sound like elephant queef’s. It’s true. The people over at some anti-virus program company decided they would create this program to stop the dumbness that leaks out of your fingers when at your computer, drunk at 2:15 in the morning.
Here’s a short video of how this thing works:
We all know you have at least 2 friends that do this on the reg. Why don’t you all be a good Santa and buy them this. The last thing you need to know is how many penis’ are drawn on your other friends face via Twitter.
An upside to this program besides blocking your friends from posting via the bottom of that JD bottle, is that you’re not jealous of them when you find out they were drinking with Kat Williams and drawing penis’ on your other friends face until 4am. Think about it. Your excuse the night before as to why you didn’t go out was that you had to stay back and watch The Beautician and the Beast with your girlfriend. Eyes. Check. Ears. Check. Balls. Balls? Nope, no balls.
An upside to this program blocking you from posting drunk on the internet, is that it can’t stop you from drunk dialing your ex-girlfriend from college. “Hey Jenny, it’s Captain Polish. Remember me? No, I’m the one stumbled into your dorm room drunk and naked that one night and threw up all over your roommate’s computer. Well at the time I thought it was your roommate’s computer, but was really you. Yea… Sorry about that.”