If for some reason you need to get in touch with us– like if you are the hottest women on earth and need a partner to pro-create with or you are some rich person from Africa who is dying and wants to give us all their money–you can do so by emailing us at:

thecaptain@thecaptainsmemos.com

You can also contact us if you have any ideas for our writings. If it’s good, we might just use it…and give you no credit whatsoever.